ascot/neckerchief source

[DD MacDonald]

Yahtie, I usually fold a square scarf in two so that it is a ttriangle and then loosely roll or fold it from the center point, creating a 4 inch wide band that I simply tie around the neck with an overhand knot. Very simple. Nothing to tuck in down the back and the tails go down the front. DDM

[Guest]

I've seen dogs wearing bandannas and they look very nice, i guess it's the same with men and women, it makes us look prettier, it's just a decorative.
i think the scarf or bandanna makes one, look relaxed and joyful.

[alden]

I have often remarked that the ascot or silk neckerchief is an incredibly useful item. In fact, it is so elegant precisely because it performs a necessary function with grace, beauty and comfort. Unfortunately, we are social creatures, and those of us that are American below a certain age are burdened with the simple fact that wearing an ascot in most circumstances is a sure way to draw unwanted attention. That is simply the way it is for me, and I have to look at it the same way I look at death and taxes. They are all things I may not like, but ignore at my peril.

As useful and elegant as ascots may be, in the US, in the circles in which I travel, ascots are inconsistent with the kind of elegance that stems from a cohesive whole with no individual part clamoring for attention - the ascot will always stand out as odd and slightly pretentious dress. Would that it were not, but it is.

If you can fix this for me, please do. l

Dopey,

I feel your pain.

Is it a question of class envy in which ascots are associated with the dreadful "rich" who need to be taxed? In Europe ascot wearers range from peasants to princes and includes everything in between. The idea is to keep the neck warm and inject a bit of color to the face after all.

Its funny because America is always perceived as the one place on earth where "anything goes" and yet its citizens are tripped up by a simple slip of silk. Its very strange indeed.



Cheers

Michael

[yialabis]

I agree with M.Alden and I can also relate to you Dopey ... Athens is not the best place for an elegantly dressed and behaved man, It used to be but it is not anymore. People spend lots on clothing but it is on labels and fashion .I buy my scarves from HERMES . I think they make lovely ascots and because the have such a beautiful color and pattern variation the can be worn with many different outfits. Plus they feel great .!

Dopey, the last time I went to my office's corner coffee shop to get an espresso the bar staff were" secretly» laughing at the fact I was wearing a borsalino ..! I'm the only one who wears a scarf or a tie at work and it is not because I have to! Even my fiancée thinks that I am overdressed when we would go out for a walk in Notting Hill (she is a doctor working in London at the moment) or any other part of town on a Sunday afternoon when I wear a scarf around my neck or a poshet in my coat pocket. I agree, we are indeed social creatures and we care about what others say or think and how we relate to them. But on the other hand caring about our self and relating firstly to our values and beliefs can not be a mainstream kind of "attitude" simply because most people don't do it . I smile gently to the people who look at me strangely when I wear a scarf or an ascot etc.. and they seem to get embarrassed and they look away. Lately it seems they have stopped looking..or have I stopped looking at who is looking ? !

Kind regards
Vassilis

[Guest]

if they laugh that's not good, they should fear you. or at least leave them on a state of awe.

[alden]

the last time I went to my office's corner coffee shop to get an espresso the bar staff were" secretly» laughing at the fact I was wearing a borsalino ..! I'm the only one who wears a scarf or a tie at work and it is not because I have to! Even my fiancée thinks that I am overdressed when we would go out for a walk in Notting Hill (she is a doctor working in London at the moment) or any other part of town on a Sunday afternoon when I wear a scarf around my neck or a poshet in my coat pocket. I agree, we are indeed social creatures and we care about what others say or think and how we relate to them. But on the other hand caring about our self and relating firstly to our values and beliefs can not be a mainstream kind of "attitude" simply because most people don't do it . I smile gently to the people who look at me strangely when I wear a scarf or an ascot etc.. and they seem to get embarrassed and they look away. Lately it seems they have stopped looking..or have I stopped looking at who is looking ? !

The rock song says that “women love a well dressed man” and frankly that has always been my experience. On the street, if any looks I attract from the ladies, they tend to be tender, approving smiles, a wave of the hand, a thumbs up and clever grin or requests for photographs. I am endeavoring to understand why this is and it will be the subject of an upcoming article called “Sartorial Seduction.”

Men on the other hand tend to be pretty surly. I suspect this is because they are envious and there are two kinds of envy. There is the envy from men who would like to dress well but cannot, and there is the envy from men who would like to dress well but cannot. Whether it’s a case of lack of resources or lack of good taste, these two classes of men display varying levels of aggressivity towards elegance.

In any case, you should know that throughout recorded history, the brightest of men, whether writers, composers, artists, intellectuals were almost always considered “overdressed” for their times. I suppose it is another subject for an article, but wit and elegance have always been closely associated. This should be encouraging for you.

Personally speaking I revere and protect my well earned status of “non social” person. Any other form of life would be intolerable. I feel very much sorry for those who imagine they have to spend their one life "keeping up with the Morlocks." Or should that be "keeping down with the Morlocks?"

Cheers

M Alden

[Guest]

you can also check the paisley silk scarfs at Paul Stuart on Madison ave. i was enchanted last night, watching the mannequins on their windows.

[Luca]

A quick answer to those posters who have found their elegant accessories to attract unwanted attention.

Attitude is a key element, here. By that, I don’t mean ‘attitude’ as in: an aggressive demeanor or insolence. I mean the thought that goes behind it. If you wear something in a self-conscious manner, perhaps with a subconscious desire to impress others, that attitude tends to transmit to others and it is more likely to attract ridicule (which, in turn, stems from the offending person’s sense of insecurity).

If you were elegant clothes entirely to satisfy your own sense of aesthetics that, too, will transmit. Therefore, accept compliments graciously but without going on about it. Similarly, face irony with steely deadpan.

If you truly enjoy wearing ascots, wear them. Often. As often as you like. Wear them for what they are, not foppish props but comfortable and attractive neck-warmers. Wear them rakishly, daringly. Wear them with Jeans and a corduroy jacket. Wear them without a jacket, if you like. Alternate simple cotton bandannas with the most outrageous silks. Anyone that matters in your life, will soon learn to appreciate, maybe even respect, at the very least allow to go unremarked, your sartorial distinctions.

Don’t be afraid to say, politely but clearly: “I have my own sense of style. It’s not important, but I prefer it to having my clothes picked for me by MTV / The Gap’s advertising budget”. Or: “I don’t dress to conform; I dress for comfort and to suit my own taste”.

[alden]

Attitude is a key element, here. By that, I don’t mean ‘attitude’ as in: an aggressive demeanor or insolence. I mean the thought that goes behind it. If you wear something in a self-conscious manner, perhaps with a subconscious desire to impress others, that attitude tends to transmit to others and it is more likely to attract ridicule (which, in turn, stems from the offending person’s sense of insecurity).

If you were elegant clothes entirely to satisfy your own sense of aesthetics that, too, will transmit. Therefore, accept compliments graciously but without going on about it. Similarly, face irony with steely deadpan.

If you truly enjoy wearing ascots, wear them. Often. As often as you like. Wear them for what they are, not foppish props but comfortable and attractive neck-warmers. Wear them rakishly, daringly. Wear them with Jeans and a corduroy jacket. Wear them without a jacket, if you like. Alternate simple cotton bandannas with the most outrageous silks. Anyone that matters in your life, will soon learn to appreciate, maybe even respect, at the very least allow to go unremarked, your sartorial distinctions.

Don’t be afraid to say, politely but clearly: “I have my own sense of style. It’s not important, but I prefer it to having my clothes picked for me by MTV / The Gap’s advertising budget”. Or: “I don’t dress to conform; I dress for comfort and to suit my own taste”.

Nice seeing you Luca. Excellent post.

Our courage and character is called upon in many ways every day. It might seem a luxurious expenditure of these resources to apply them to our dress. But the thought of accepting slavishly the conformer’s whip is a bit too much for some of us. Better to run at an elegant tangent to the norm, a whisper’s reach but all so far away.

Cheers

M Alden

[dopey]

A note to Luca and others on attitude. I have to agree, that the wearer's attitude goes a long way towards making him look comfortable in his clothes. Despite my comments about not liking to wear an ascot because of the attention it draws, I don't hesitate to wear a bowtie on weekends, even in casual circumstances. That is what I am used to. An objective reader would note that a bowtie on a Sunday afternoon can hardly be less of an oddity than an ascot, but all I could respond is that I am comfortable with the one and less so with the other.

[yialabis]

One can not change the way people react to certain things , one can only change the way it affects him, if it does at all ! I appreciate your suggestions Luca

I have my own sense of style. It’s not important, but I prefer it to having my clothes picked for me by MTV / The Gap’s advertising budget

and I wouldn't go even to the trouble of justifying my sense of style to anyone. I don't even look down in any way to the people that wear gap nor do I think I am better or that I know more in any matter then they do. They obviously have their own opinion about getting dressed and some of them do think that the way I dress is ridiculous in a post-modern world of fast and practical living. I on the other hand find my way very practical and elegant and I also find it fair to trade with. (meaning that I don’t buy clothes that were made by children for a plate of rice). But that is only my way of thinking and doing things and one of my teachers said that the moment I fall too much in love with my own theory that moment I lose site of what the other parts contained in the whole of this life has to offer . ! I learn from the millions of years of eco systems, sustainability and resilience depends upon the inclusiveness of difference!

Kind regards
Vassilis

[S. Goldman]

I suspect that the balance has recently shifted slightly toward approval of elegant, but unusual dress. The reason, oddly enough, may be the disappearance of the office uniform. The last several generations of men tended to think of coats and neckgear as work clothes, to be removed as soon as the job was done. With associations of professional duty reduced, somewhat younger guys seem to regard dressing well as a personal choice rather than an attempt to "be" someone that one is not.

[Guest]

is it just me, but every time i see some wearing some type of silk around their necks, it's always some pitiful unattractive, badly tied bandanna, in ugly colors or gray shades, it's indeed very funny, but they don't always give prizes for trying. and if you add some dick Tracy or Indiana Jones hat, they'll rightfully laugh.