Great One Liners

Discuss travel, watches, gastronomy, wines, boats and all other aspects of the Elegant life
Frog in Suit
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Thu Jan 22, 2009 10:43 pm

marcelo wrote:Cher Frog in Suit

Waugh’s definitions of a gentleman may, indeed, be misleading. But the supposition that there is the ‘right’ definition is no less elusive. Waugh himself realised that any definition of a gentleman is usually contrived in such a way as to include the very person who proposes the definition, leaving aside everybody else he judges to be immediately bellow him. In a letter, Waugh affirms the following:

“… the basic principle of English social life is that everyone… thinks he is a gentleman. There is a second principle of almost equal importance: everyone draws the line of demarcation immediately below his own heel.”

Waugh himself seems to have been throughout his life quite unsure as to where to draw this line. John Howard Wilson recalls a telling episode in Waugh’s biography: after having been admitted to the gentleman’s club Beefsteak, Waugh once ordered a door man to go outside, under pouring rain, to get him a cab. The doorman refused and shouted: ‘A taxi for Mr Waugh, what isn’t a gentleman’. Waugh was outraged and expected the doorman to be fired. This did not happen and Waugh, then, resigned. But does one fail to be a gentleman if a doorman refuses to act upon one's wish? Indeed, maybe a gentleman would not even have made such a request, in those circumstances, in the first instance. But then I have already chosen a definition of gentleman

Incidentally, this portion of Wilson’s book, narrating this episode in Waugh’s life, is available at:
http://books.google.com/books?id=RQ7Jiw ... #PPA103,M1 )
Dear Marcelo,
I must apologize for not responding sooner. I only unaccountably found your post now. I must have forgotten to follow up on the topic.

The Beefsteack Club anecdote is a good one. I have only read Selina Hastings' biography of E.W. (Vintage, Random House, 1994); Unless I am mistaken, it does not appear in her book.

Much of English litterature is concerned with the class system. I find it delightful to read about, but would find it heavy going if I had to live in it. I have been exposed to some class resentment while living in the UK, usually through my innocently putting my foot in it, and felt as if I had stumbled into someone else's conflict (not unlike a neighbour's marital scene), although not a party to it. I can always fall back to acting bloody-minded. It is half expected of the French, anyhow :lol: .

I have saved the link to the Wilson book for later. It is almost midnight here.

Frog in Suit
storeynicholas

Thu Jan 22, 2009 11:56 pm

Dear FiS,
Give some examples of the strife that you have seen!!
NJS
marcelo
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Fri Jan 23, 2009 5:22 pm

François de La Rochefoucauld
RÉFLEXIONS OU SENTENCES ET MAXIMES MORALES (1664)

“Chacun veut être un autre, et n'être plus ce qu'il est: ils cherchent une contenance hors d'eux-mêmes, et un autre esprit que le leur; ils prennent des tons et des manières au hasard; ils en font l'expérience sur eux, sans considérer que ce qui convient à quelques-uns ne convient pas à tout le monde, qu'il n'y a point de règle générale pour les tons et pour les manières, et qu'il n'y a point de bonnes copies.”

(“All men want to be different, and to be greater than they are; they seek for an air other than their own, and a mind different from what they possess; they take their style and manner at chance. They make experiments upon themselves without considering that what suits one person will not suit everyone, that there is no universal rule for taste or manners, and that there are no good copies.”)

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Frog in Suit
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Fri Jan 23, 2009 7:52 pm

marcelo wrote:François de La Rochefoucauld
RÉFLEXIONS OU SENTENCES ET MAXIMES MORALES (1664)

“Chacun veut être un autre, et n'être plus ce qu'il est: ils cherchent une contenance hors d'eux-mêmes, et un autre esprit que le leur; ils prennent des tons et des manières au hasard; ils en font l'expérience sur eux, sans considérer que ce qui convient à quelques-uns ne convient pas à tout le monde, qu'il n'y a point de règle générale pour les tons et pour les manières, et qu'il n'y a point de bonnes copies.”

(“All men want to be different, and to be greater than they are; they seek for an air other than their own, and a mind different from what they possess; they take their style and manner at chance. They make experiments upon themselves without considering that what suits one person will not suit everyone, that there is no universal rule for taste or manners, and that there are no good copies.”)
Excellent! But are we not all to some extent guilty of that, inasmuch as we have both a public (or social) and private persona, dress being but a component of the whole ?

Frog in Suit
ottovbvs
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Wed Feb 04, 2009 1:33 pm

I just came upon this thread which is superb. A great source of one liners in a previous age was F. E. Smith but surely today's richest vein are the movies of Woody Allen which absolutely bulge with them. He's quite a match for Groucho. One choice morsel remembered (roughly) from Radio Days which I watched a couple of months ago
Mother (in agitated state): you're never going to amount to anything unless you stop listening to the radio and concentrate on your school work.
Child: But you're always listening to the radio!
Mother: You don't understand, our lives are ruined already!
ottovbvs
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Wed Feb 04, 2009 1:36 pm

carl browne wrote:WC Fields was good with one liners:

There's a story--true, I think--that has the athiest WC in the hospital, on his death-bed, leafing through a copy of the Bible. When a friend asks him what he's doing, he responds, "looking for loopholes."

The other great line is of WC saying that he loves children, "but only if they're properly cooked."
Or

A man can't be all bad who hates children and dogs.
storeynicholas

Wed Feb 04, 2009 2:04 pm

Maybe a lesser known F ESmith line arose as follows: there was a dining club called the Other Club comprising F E Smith, Churchill, Gerald Du Maurier and a host of leaders in their fields in the professions and the arts. They used to dine in a private room in the Savoy Hotel. One evening FE Smith and Churchill were present with many others and FE was looking a little bloated so Churchill said: 'Are you pregnant FE?' to which FE replied:
'If it is a boy, I shall call it Frederick. If it is a girl, I shall call it Frederica but, if, as I suspect, it is merely wind, I shall call it W[h]inny.'
NJS
ottovbvs
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Wed Feb 04, 2009 2:45 pm

storeynicholas wrote:Maybe a lesser known F ESmith line arose as follows: there was a dining club called the Other Club comprising F E Smith, Churchill, Gerald Du Maurier and a host of leaders in their fields in the professions and the arts. They used to dine in a private room in the Savoy Hotel. One evening FE Smith and Churchill were present with many others and FE was looking a little bloated so Churchill said: 'Are you pregnant FE?' to which FE replied:
'If it is a boy, I shall call it Frederick. If it is a girl, I shall call it Frederica but, if, as I suspect, it is merely wind, I shall call it W[h]inny.'
NJS
I'm struggling to remember some incredible put down F. E. had for a judge but it won't come. Margot Asquith, the wife of H. H. Asquith, no mean contender in the one liner stakes, said Smith is very clever but sometimes his brains go to his head. She also came up with this great put down when she was having lunch with some Hollywood filmstars in the twenties including Jean Harlow who irritated her by addressing her as Mar-got and not Margo as was the correct pronunciation. "Ms Harlow I do wish you'd stop calling me Mar-got , my name is Margo...the T is silent as in Harlow"
ottovbvs
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Wed Feb 04, 2009 2:58 pm

storeynicholas wrote:Maybe a lesser known F ESmith line arose as follows: there was a dining club called the Other Club comprising F E Smith, Churchill, Gerald Du Maurier and a host of leaders in their fields in the professions and the arts. They used to dine in a private room in the Savoy Hotel. One evening FE Smith and Churchill were present with many others and FE was looking a little bloated so Churchill said: 'Are you pregnant FE?' to which FE replied:
'If it is a boy, I shall call it Frederick. If it is a girl, I shall call it Frederica but, if, as I uspect, it is merely wind, I shall call it W[h]inny.'
NJS
I had to resort to Wikiquote but these are some legal beauties from F. E. as well as one about Churchill. The Other Club still exists btw.

He has devoted the best years of his life to preparing his impromptu speeches. (On Winston Churchill)

In Court, as a young barrister:
Judge: I have read your case, Mr Smith, and I am no wiser now than I was when I started.
Smith: Possibly not, My Lord, but much better informed.

Judge: Are you trying to show contempt for this court, Mr Smith?
Smith: No, My Lord. I am attempting to conceal it.

Judge: Have you ever heard of a saying by Bacon — the great Bacon — that youth and discretion are ill-wedded companions?
Smith: Yes, I have. And have you ever heard of a saying of Bacon — the great Bacon — that a much-talking judge is like an ill-tuned cymbal?

Judge: You are extremely offensive, young man!
Smith: As a matter of fact we both are; but I am trying to be, and you can't help it.

Judge: Mr Smith, you must not direct the jury. What do you suppose I am on the bench for?
Smith: It is not for me, your honour, to attempt to fathom the inscrutable workings of Providence.

Smith (to witness): So, you were as drunk as a judge?
Judge (interjecting): You mean as drunk as a lord?
Smith: Yes, My Lord.

Master of the Rolls: Really, Mr Smith, do give this Court credit for some little intelligence.
Smith: That is the mistake I made in the Court below, My Lord.
carl browne
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Thu Feb 05, 2009 12:11 am

My favorite Groucho story:

Groucho hosted a TV program called You Bet Your LIfe.

One of his guests was a woman with twelve children.

"Well, I love my husband," she tells him.

"I love my cigar, but I take it out once in a while."

C
marcelo
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Thu Feb 05, 2009 2:15 am

Frog in Suit wrote:
marcelo wrote:François de La Rochefoucauld
RÉFLEXIONS OU SENTENCES ET MAXIMES MORALES (1664)

“Chacun veut être un autre, et n'être plus ce qu'il est: ils cherchent une contenance hors d'eux-mêmes, et un autre esprit que le leur; ils prennent des tons et des manières au hasard; ils en font l'expérience sur eux, sans considérer que ce qui convient à quelques-uns ne convient pas à tout le monde, qu'il n'y a point de règle générale pour les tons et pour les manières, et qu'il n'y a point de bonnes copies.”

(“All men want to be different, and to be greater than they are; they seek for an air other than their own, and a mind different from what they possess; they take their style and manner at chance. They make experiments upon themselves without considering that what suits one person will not suit everyone, that there is no universal rule for taste or manners, and that there are no good copies.”)
Excellent! But are we not all to some extent guilty of that, inasmuch as we have both a public (or social) and private persona, dress being but a component of the whole ?

Frog in Suit
Maybe dress is in the middle, supposing there is a middle in the distinction betweenn the public and the private personae.
marcelo
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Thu Feb 12, 2009 2:46 am

Upon his arrival in Oxford, Charles Ryder gets this piece of advice from his uncle:

“Dress as you do in a country house. Never wear a tweed coat and flannel trousers – always a suit. And go to a London tailor; you get better cut and longer credit.”

Brideshead Revisited, E. Waught
Pelham
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Mon Feb 16, 2009 4:13 am

Currently reading Boswell's Life of Johnson. Some good dry ones there. On meeting Johnson for the first time, and knowing of his prejudices, Boswell makes an attempt at wit by apologising for being Scottish, saying he "can't help it.". Johnson says, "That, sir, I find, is what a very great many of your countrymen cannot help."
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